All for Knot: Book Two (PAPERBACK, LGBT)

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ONE

Juniper

I STARED. MOUTH OPEN, jaw hanging, blank-eyed with shock. Because. What. Spencer was giving me the kind of look that said he’d expected just such a reaction. Hamid, by contrast, was giving me a different kind of look—one that said he was disappointed to discover I was actually a blithering idiot, rather than the reasonably intelligent person he’d assumed I was.

Christ. They wanted a mate-bond with us? For lack of any better ideas, I dragged my gaze over to Angel. He looked… frightened? No, that wasn’t the right word, exactly. Filled with dread, maybe. Like there was something he didn’t want to face, and the alphas had just shoved it under his nose.

“Perhaps we should leave you two alone to talk,” Hamid said.
Spencer grunted agreement. “An offer is just that. An offer. I hope you’ll both at least consider it, though. This pack needs shaking up, because what we’ve been doing up until now hasn’t been working.”

“But… what about Xavier?” I blurted.

Spencer shook his head ruefully. “Does Xavier seem happy to you?”

And… no. He didn’t. But he’d also seemed pretty dead set against ever having another mate. Or at least, another mate who looked like me.

“Hamid’s right,” Angel said tightly. “You should leave.”

Spencer rose without protest, and Hamid followed suit.

“You know where to find us if you want to discuss it more,” Spencer said. “Goodnight, Angel. Goodnight, Juni.”

Hamid gave us a nod, and they went, leaving Angel and me alone with the buttery wreckage of expensive French takeout. The sound of the front door opening and closing filtered back to us. Angel slumped in his uncomfortable dining room chair, blowing out a harsh breath.

“I…” I began, and I had to stop for a moment before I tried again. “What… just happened?”

“You happened, I think.” Angel’s voice was a hoarse rasp.

I shook my head, slowly at first, and then with increasing desperation. “But I didn’t… I mean… I don’t…” I paused. Swallowed hard. “Okay, just to be clear, you did know already that they want to mate you. Right?”

He gave a harsh snort. It wasn’t a nice noise. “Did I know they’re willing to take me on out of pity? Yeah, I knew.”

I gaped at him, honestly shocked. “That’s not… no. Don’t talk like that! I’m the pity case here, not you.”

My brain was scrambling to make sense of the last few minutes, and all I could come up with was that Spencer and Hamid were trying to make sure Angel knew that they wouldn’t make him choose between them and me. Even if it meant they’d be saddled with a second mate who was basically a complete fuck-up when it came to being a functional adult.

Angel and I stared at each other in mutual incomprehension for an embarrassingly long time. The longer the silence stretched, the more ridiculous it felt. Valiantly, I plowed through everything that had been said, trying to look at things objectively.

An uncomfortable, twisty feeling churned in my gut.

“Or,” I said slowly, “maybe they really do want to mate both of us because…” I struggled to come up with some more benign reason. “They like us?”

Angel pushed his chair back with a screech of furniture against tile and rose abruptly, pacing away. I sat watching him, hugging myself. He fetched up at the kitchen sink, his fingernails scratching restlessly at the sleeves of his hoodie. If his arms had been bare, he would have left marks on his skin.

“Talk to me, please?” I begged, needing to focus on something other than my own neurotic insecurities.

“I can’t mate them,” Angel said in a monotone. “Because if I mate them, they’ll be stuck for life with a broken omega, and I’ll end up destroying their pack because I’m so fucked up. But now they want to mate you, and they’re playing some kind of… mind game, where they’ll only take us as a package deal. So, if I say no, then I’m ruining your life, too.”

My eyes widened. “Whoa! Hang on a minute. That’s not what’s happening here.”

“Isn’t it?” he asked.

I wanted to jump up and go to him. Wrap my arms around him and hold him tight. But I was pretty sure if I did, it would only freak him out more.

“I don’t think so?” I said, irritated by the way the words tilted up into a question. I shook my head sharply, trying to jar some brain cells loose. “Seriously. That’s not what I took away from the conversation at all.”

Angel peered cautiously over his shoulder at me, but he didn’t say anything.

“First,” I continued, “I’m in a relationship with you. Not with them. Not in the way that matters. I’m not going to do anything unless it’s something you also want to do.”

I ignored the little ache growing from the bottom of my chest. The one that whispered, but what if?

The tense line of Angel’s shoulders eased a bit. “No… I know that,” he said.

Some of my own tension eased in response. “I have to ask, though. Have you really never thought about it?” I licked my lips, trying to bring moisture back to my mouth. “Not even, like, a daydream? About how it might be if things were different?”

A choked noise shook free of his throat. He turned away again.

“Of course I have.” His voice trembled. “I’m not made of stone, Juni.”

I couldn’t stand it anymore. “Is it okay if I hug you?”

He hesitated, then nodded—still not looking at me. I approached from the side, so he’d be able to see me coming in his peripheral vision. When he didn’t flinch away, I plastered myself to his back and wrapped my arms around him from behind. He bowed his head. After a moment, one of his hands came up to cover mine where it lay over his pounding heart.

We stayed that way for several minutes, until his racing pulse slowed, and I felt less like the ground was falling away beneath me.

“Are you and I all right?” I asked, a little afraid of the answer.

“Yeah,” he said immediately. “We’re okay, Juni.”

Relief flooded me. “Good. As long as we’re okay, then we’ll figure things out together.”

* * *

We were curled up in the nest a few hours later when our phones buzzed in unison. It was a group text, from Hamid to Xavier, Spencer, Angel, and me.

You might want to turn on the news, it said. Things just got complicated.

Fresh trepidation settled in my stomach, making me wish I’d suggested something lighter for dinner.

“Oh, god,” Angel said. “What now?”

He went rummaging for the remote, and a moment later the flatscreen brightened to life. Angel flipped through a few channels, finally landing on a news station flashing election results across the bottom of the screen.

“We can now report a projected winner in the Tower Village London Borough Council mayoral race,” said the female newscaster, standing in front of a digital results board. “Percival Rathbone has just declared victory with fifty-one-point-six percent of the vote.”

Angel cursed under his breath, low and heartfelt. A steel band tightened around my chest. I couldn’t breathe. The TV cut to a view of Percy standing behind a podium in a packed room. He was smiling… lifting a hand to quiet the excited crowd.

“Thank you. Thank you all,” he said. “I’m pleased to report that the official results are in. I’ve just spoken with my opponent on the phone and accepted his concession. With your support, I’m happy to announce the beginning of a new, family-friendly administration for London’s East End. No longer will we turn a blind eye toward the slow moral degradation of our great borough. Your voices have been heard, and now it’s time to clean up our streets and take the rubbish out where it belongs!”

I sat frozen, staring into that smug face that I’d once convinced myself I loved. Angel’s fingers tangled with mine, and I turned wide eyes to him, seeing my own horror reflected back at me in his expression.

End of excerpt